Take A Stand: Prevention of Bullying
8 year olds – Instructional Guide Day 3
By Sherryll Kraizer, Ph.D.
- To practice skills for handling bullying behaviors through role-play
- To recognize their feelings as an observer
- To recognize costs and payoffs of bullying
- To declare commitment to no longer tolerate bullying in their community
Teacher-Directed Discussion and Role-play (RP)
We want to spend our time today practicing standing up effectively to bullying behavior and being powerful advocates.
RP: Who’s ready to role-play today? (3 bullies, 1 victim, 1 advocate)
Bullies: You are making fun of a new kid, saying things about how s/he looks or acts?
Advocate: You know this is wrong and makes the new kid feel bad. What could you do?
Possible responses: “That’s not very nice, let’s find a way to make her feel welcome.” Or “I think we hurt her feelings. I’m going to go spend the rest of recess with her.”
Discussion: What is exclusion and how does it make people feel?
How do you feel as an observer, when you see it happening?
RP: (1 bully, 1 victim, 1 advocate)
Bully: You are an older kid taking lunch money away from someone.
Advocate: What could you do to help your friend?
Possible responses: “You’re being a bully, stop it.” Or “Leave my friend alone.” Or “Come on (friend), let’s go tell the teacher.”
How do you think your friend feels when you intervene?
How do you feel seeing this happen?
How do you feel after you intervene?
RP: (1 bully, 1 victim, 3 laughing, 1 advocate)
Bully says: “Your hair looks like you slept in a trash can!” and the kids standing around start to laugh?
Advocate: How could you intervene?
Possible responses, “That’s not a very nice thing to say.” Or “That’s really unkind, stop it! Or “I’m not going to hang with people who act this way.” Or “That’s hurtful, cut it out.”
RP: (3 bullies, 1 victim)
Bullies: You are teasing someone.
Victim: What if several kids are taunting you? We can’t count only on advocates; we need to be skilled at standing up for ourselves as well. What could you say and do?
Possible responses: Walk away and join another group. Say, “I’m going to tell if you do that again.” Then, get away and tell.
RP: (1 bully, 1 victim, 3 laughing, 1 advocate)
Bully says, “You stink” and the kids standing around start to laugh?
Victim: How are you going to respond?
Possible responses: “That really hurts my feelings.” Or “That’s not a very nice thing to say.” Or just walk away.
What could one of the kids standing around say to be an advocate?
Possible responses: “That’s really unkind, stop it!” Or “I’m not going to hang with people who act this way.” Or “That’s hurtful, cut it out.”
RP: (1 bully, 1 victim)
Bully: You pull the other person’s hair every time they walk by you?
Victim: What is your response?
Possible responses: “You’re a jerk, I’m going to tell.”
Bully says, “Go ahead and tell, I don’t care.”
Victim: What are you going to say or do?
Desired response: Tell anyway
Is this tattling?
No, tattling is when you tell on another kid or your brothers or sisters to get them in trouble.
Telling because you need help with a problem is not tattling.
Impact of Bullying
How many of you can see that you might have been a bully in the past, even though you didn’t know it at the time?
How did it feel at the time you did it?
How did it feel later?
Did your friends know about it at the time?
How did they react at the time?
How did the person you bullied feel?
Costs and Payoffs
Who can identify some of the costs of bullying in our community? What does it take away from us?
|Costs of Bullying||Payoffs of Bullying||Payoffs to Observers|
|Physical effects, injuries, etc.||Power||Entertainment|
|Feeling of not belonging||Control||Glad it’s not them|
|Feeling like dirt, worthless||Feeling smarter||Safe because it’s not them|
|Low self-esteem||Feeling tougher|
|Loss of community||Feeling superior|
|Loss of friendship||Getting revenge|
|Loss of privileges||Feeling safe|
|Loss of feeling safe / Fear||Reaction of other|
|Loss of energy and aliveness||Popularity|
|Loss of respect for others|
What do people get out of bullying? What is the payoff for them? They must get something out of it, or they wouldn’t keep doing it?
Are these things worth it — remembering all the bad feelings that come from bullying?
Raise your hand if you are willing to pay attention to your own behavior for a few days and see if you can identify times when you are a bit of a bully; then notice how you feel and how it makes others feel.
Raise your hand if you promise to be an advocate for other people being bullied by either speaking up yourself or going to get an adult who can help.
Day 4 – Preventing emotional and physical bullying
Day 5 – Learning to tell and ask for help effectively
© 2016 Sherryll Kraizer, Ph.D. Used with permission