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Take A Stand: Prevention of Bullying – Ages 9-10, Day 4

Take A Stand: Prevention of Bullying

9-10 year olds – Instructional Guide Day 4

By Sherryll Kraizer, Ph.D.

 

Objectives

  • To recognize bullying behaviors in themselves
  • To identify costs and payoffs of bullying
  • To act after they have been a bully to clean it up.

 

Teacher-Directed Discussion and Role-play

 

Impact of Bullying

How many of you can see that you might have been a bully in the past, even though you didn’t know it at the time?

How did it feel at the time you did it?

How did it feel later?

Did your friends know about it at the time?

How did they react at the time?

How did the person you bullied feel?

 

Costs and Payoffs

Who can identify some of the costs of bullying in our community?  What does it take away from us? 

NOTE: Start with a blank graph and add elements as students name them.  You can help with ones they don’t think of.

 

Costs of Bullying Payoffs of Bullying Payoffs to Observers
Physical effects, injuries, etc. Power Entertainment
Pain Strength Protected
Feeling of not belonging Control Glad it’s not you
Feeling like dirt, worthless Feeling smarter Safe because it’s not you
Low self-esteem Feeling tougher
Loss of community Feeling superior
Loss of friendship Getting revenge
Loss of privileges Feeling safe

 

What do people get out of bullying?  

What is the payoff for them? 

They must get something out of it, or they wouldn’t keep doing it?

 

What about people who watch bullying or encourage it? 

What do they get out of it? 

 

Are these things worth it — remembering all the bad feelings that come from bullying? 

Raise your hand if you are willing to pay attention to your own behavior for a few days and see if you can identify times when you are a bit of a bully; then notice how you feel and how it makes others feel.

Raise your hand if you promise to be an advocate for other people being bullied by either speaking up yourself or going to get an adult who can help?

 

Role-Play (RP)

 

RP: I need 5 people to help me (3 bullies 1 victim, 1 advocate)

Advocate:  What if your friends are making fun of a new kid, saying things about how s/he looks or acts. 

          You know this is wrong and makes the new kid feel bad.  What could you do? 

Emphasize the role of the bullies.  How could they change their role even as the event is playing out?  If there is any hesitation, remind them about discussions of:

  • Exclusion and how it makes people feel
  • How the bullying kids feel
  • How the observers feel

 

RP: I need 3 people to help me (1 bully 1 victim, 1 advocate, several observers)

Advocate:  What if you saw an older kid taking lunch money away from one of your friends.  What could you do to help your friend?

Again, emphasize the role of the observers.

  • How do you think your friend feels?
  • How do you feel seeing this happen?
  • What could you do?

 

RP: I need 4 people to help me (3 bullies 1 victim)

What if a group of kids in your neighborhood threatens you?  What would you do?  Who would you tell?

Discuss the role of avoidance.  How does that make you feel? Is it possible that sometimes avoidance is the best response?

 

RP: I need 5 people to help me (3 bullies 1 victim, 1 advocate)

Advocate:  What if you see a group of kids saying to another kid things like, “You’re so stupid, you can’t even remember your name!”  What could you do?

Again, emphasize the role of the observers.

  • Discuss how this makes the bullied child feel.
  • Discuss how the bullying child feels.
  • Discuss how you feel seeing this happen.

 

Discussion:

How many of you can think of a time when you were a bully, or made someone feel bad with your words?

Discuss specific instances including the feelings of the bully and being bullied.

Did anyone tell you your behavior wasn’t nice?

How did that make you feel?

Did you apologize or do something else to make the other person feel better?

How did that make you feel? 

I’d like you to pay attention to how you treat other people and practice taking responsibility for cleaning up after you’ve hurt someone else.

 

Activity

Think of someone you have been unkind to, or have bullied.  Apologize to that person in the next 24 hours.  Notice how you feel anticipating apologizing, while you are apologizing, and how you feel after you apologize.  Did apologizing make any difference in how you feel about the other person or how the other person feels about you?

 

Day 5 – Preventing emotional abuse & getting help

© 2016 Sherryll Kraizer, Ph.D.  Used with permission.

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Author Dr. Sherryll Kraizer has a Ph.D. in education with a specialization in youth at risk.